I really do not understand this age shaming of women, it’s like saying women are the only ones that age but men age too so why aren’t they age shamed?
This happened to me a few years ago while i was at university. After i had my first two kids and they were in full time education i decided it was the right time to go back to university to get my degree in tourism management i was 31 years old at the time. So me and my class mates were flying to Italy for one of our modules and one of my friends how was in her 20’s picked me up from my house to go to the airport and her dad was driving us there so on the way my friends goes to her dad “oh my god dad can you believe she’s got children?” because i look young for my age and he asked how old i was and my friend told him then he proceed to ask me “what am i doing in university?”.
ohhhh guys if we weren’t on the motorway i would have got out of the car because i could not believe this guy who doesn’t know me from nowhere or know my story is telling me i should not be in university and up to now i keep thinking about it like how dare you? are you the one going to pay my tuition fees back? are you my mum? if he wasn’t old or my friend’s dad i could have said something rude.
Women are judged for everything from, when you should be married, have a child, too old to have a child, too young, why are you at home taking care of your child instead of working, why are you at work and not taking care of your child, it’s just endless bashing of women and it seems we can’t catch a break. it seems like everything we do is watched and judged.
And i think this is why some women choose to never have kids and focus on a career because if you have worked your butt off and your at a level in your career you are happy with then decide to start a family chances are your career might take a knock down when you return all because you decided to start a family, how is this right?.
This is where this saying comes from that “women can’t have it all” but why can’t we? we can’t have it all because we are not supported enough. Most of the time when we have children we are expected to be the ones to stay home and take care of the baby not the other way around though there men that stay home and the partner goes back to work and when it comes’s to promotions men are first in line to get it before a woman why? because its a man’s world whatever that means, the home front is us even though you both were at work the guy comes in and chills while you sort dinner and everything else. I actually think this is where the whole independent woman thing came from because if your not supporting me them am doing it on my own which make me independent but some men don’t like this either because they want us to depend on them.
Even the way we dress is shamed at times, if you wear a short skirt your a hoe, if a guy tries to talk to a woman and she turns him down your a hoe, if you wear trousers your not feminine enough, if you wear a lot of makeup your hiding something and if you have no makeup you don’t take care of yourself! it’s a a lot that we get judged on but we still find ways of breaking down barriers regardless what our age is and i think that is something we have to keep doing and one day things will change.
So ladies let’s keep making these moves and show the young ladies coming up behind us that they too can do it.
Love Me x